January 2014 Musings

Yes, You Can Beat City Hall!

In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act,” said George Orwell.

duck-dynasty

When Phil Robertson of A&E TV’s “Duck Dynasty” voiced his opinion in the ongoing case of Biblical Truths vs. Political Correctness (PC), he provoked the establishment’s most dishonest disparagement of an innocent man since Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton tried to destroy George Zimmerman for defending himself against a savage attacker in Florida two years ago.

Robertson and his brother are full-bearded old timers who grew up in the segregated South and are not afraid to point out – as Phil did in a GQ Magazine interview – that the true hate existing between the races was far less during the days prior to the Civil Rights movement of the 1960s than in the mindset of today.  (Apparently, not even the creative deceivers could come up with a semi-honest challenge to that one, so they let it slide.)

However, after digging deeper into the current smokescreen hovering over reality and saying that we need only to repent and turn back to God, Phil continued, “Everything is blurred on what’s right and what’s wrong. Sin becomes fine.”

Ahh, what a perfect opening for an interviewer’s set-up, and the GQ bear grabbed it like an open jar of honey, saying, “What is sinful?”

Phil unhesitatingly replied, “Start with homosexual behavior and just morph out from there. Bestiality, sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men. Don’t be deceived. Neither the adulterers, the idolaters, the male prostitutes, the homosexual offenders, the greedy, the drunkards, the slanderers, the swindlers—they won’t inherit the kingdom of God. Don’t deceive yourself. It’s not right.”

He summed up his thoughts: “We never, ever judge someone on who’s going to heaven or hell. That’s the Almighty’s job. We just love ‘em, give ‘em the good news about Jesus—whether they’re homosexuals, drunks, terrorists. We let God sort ‘em out later. Do you see what I’m saying?”

Ol’ Phil was merely saying that there used to be a rulebook for the game of life around here, but it appears that it must have been thrown out in recent years.

It is difficult to find the dreaded “hate speech” here but, nevertheless, yielding to the PC pressure (3% or so is normal) even before most of it arrived, A&E did the expected thing by pulling the show from its programming. (Yeah, that’ll teach them country boys.)

Speaking of “country,” Cracker Barrel, the large eatery chain famous for its country cookin’, homey atmosphere, good-ol-boy patronage, and delightful southern cuisine, as well as its interesting and ever-changing line of impulse item products, made a knee-jerk decision to pull the “Duck Dynasty” product line from its shelves and then made a loud and bold announcement of it.

It backfired – not only with the restaurant executives but right into Hollywood and A&E officialdom. Cracker Barrel was first, and it took them no more than a single day of public outrage for them to realize the grievous error of their ways. And in a week, the number of letters, emails, texts, phone calls and names on circulating petitions had grown to more than a quarter million.

Begging for forgiveness before their 600+ cash registers rusted out nationwide, CEO Sandra Cochran wasted no time making an executive decision and wrote this refreshing letter to all willing to listen via the Internet:

 Dear Cracker Barrel Customer:

When we made the decision to remove and evaluate certain Duck Dynasty items, we offended many of our loyal customers. Our intent was to avoid offending, but that’s just what we’ve done. You told us we made a mistake. And, you weren’t shy about it. You wrote, you called and you took to social media to express your thoughts and feelings. You flat out told us we were wrong. We listened. Today, we are putting all our Duck Dynasty products back in our stores. And, we apologize for offending you. We respect all individual’s right to express their beliefs. We certainly did not mean to have anyone think different.(sic) We sincerely hope you will continue to be part of our Cracker Barrel family.

A&E-TV execs saw the tidal wave arriving on the horizon and yielded to the PC pressure before it even hit, yanking the Duck Dynasty program from the airwaves. Only a week later, they began to realize they had bet on a loser and acquiesced with the symbolic apology of running a marathon series of the programs all day long on Christmas day. However, upon reflection, this move actually may have been more motivated by greed than face-saving. Rumor has it (thanks to the public accolades) that the Robertsons are now being courted by other networks and may jump ship on their own.

Outspoken conservative and one-time Libertarian Party presidential candidate Wayne Allen Root said, “It’s about time we woke up and realized we have rights, too. And we have power. It’s time to not turn the other cheek. It’s time to stare right in the face of our oppressors and do unto them as they do unto us.”

And Rev. Rusty Lee Thomas got more into the Roberston-esque side of things with, “The fact that most consider [the magazine interview with Phil] controversial is an indication of how far we have fallen as a nation. Sodomy was not spoken of in polite company. It was known as the unspeakable sin. Today we cannot escape this blight on our nation. Isaiah 5:20 could easily be viewed as America’s new cultural policy, “Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; who put darkness for light, and light for darkness; who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!” In the new Amerika, vice has become virtue and virtue has become vice. As a result, America has plunged into a deep moral stupor.”

You can bet your favorite Christmas toy that not only is this not over, it has just begun. Blowhard Jesse Jackson is already making arrangements to meet with Cracker Barrel execs in January – undoubtedly to announce his displeasure at their coddling of racists. A&E shudders at the thought of any such accusation. Both will likely wilt again, somewhere down the road, because “bank balance” is always a stronger ruling factor than “moral code.”

But December’s lesson for America is “You Can Beat City Hall.” Maybe the next one we should stand up against is the ridiculous notion that food stores need to be checking the ID of senior citizens before they are allowed to buy a legal product – namely wine.

I have a solution for that one too, if anyone is interested in hearing it. See “How Seniors Can Stop the Pestering Store Clerks.”