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WIT & WISDOM 

Prince Philip’s 17 funniest gaffes that made us cry with laughter and sometimes wince

PRINCE Philip was as well known for his cheeky one-liners as he was for being the Queen’s husband.

The Duke of Edinburgh – who died this morning, aged 99 –  was respected for his deep wisdom and sharp wit in equal measure.

* Read our live blog for the very latest news on Prince Philip’s death

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 Prince Philip died this morning aged 99

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Prince Philip died this morning aged 99

He has undertaken solo Royal duties and been the Queen’s companion as she tours the UK and the globe – while making the public chuckle, cry with laughter and occasionally cringe at his off-the-cuff comments.

Here we have compiled a list of 17 times the Duke of Edinburgh made us laugh and wince.

1. Ready for bed?

 The Queen and Prince Philip with Nigerian President Olusegun Obasanjo in 2003

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The Queen and Prince Philip with Nigerian President Olusegun Obasanjo in 2003Credit: Epa

He told the President of Nigeria, while he was dressed in traditional robes, on a visit in 2003: “You look like you’re ready for bed.”

2. Horsing around

 Prince Philip walking with his daughter Princess Anne to a Christmas Day service at Sandringham in 2005

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Prince Philip walking with his daughter Princess Anne to a Christmas Day service at Sandringham in 2005Credit: Getty Images

His daughter, Princess Anne, has a well documented love of horses. In 1970 Prince Philip addressed this and said: “If it doesn’t fart or eat hay, she isn’t interested.”

3. Race relations

 The Duke of Edinburgh pictured talking with Aboriginal men in Queensland, Australia

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The Duke of Edinburgh pictured talking with Aboriginal men in Queensland, AustraliaCredit: PA:Press Association

In 2002, when visiting an Aboriginal culture park in the Queensland rainforests of Australia, he asked an Aboriginal businessman: “Do you still throw spears at each other?” William Brim replied: “No. We don’t do that any more.”

4. Architectural advice

 Queen Elizabeth with German President Johannes Rau and the Duke of Edinburgh

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Queen Elizabeth with German President Johannes Rau and the Duke of EdinburghCredit: Reuters

When the Duke of Edinburgh and the Queen visited the British Embassy in Berlin in 2002 he commented: “It’s a vast waste of space.”

5. Thirsty work 

 The Duke of Edinburgh and the Queen are greeted by Italian premier Giuliano Amato on a 2000 visit to Rome

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The Duke of Edinburgh and the Queen are greeted by Italian premier Giuliano Amato on a 2000 visit to RomeCredit: Epa

Working as hard as Prince Philip can be thirsty work. In 2002 when he visited Italy with the Queen the Prince demanded “I don’t care what kind it is, just get me a beer” after a long hard day meeting Italian premier Giuliano Amato.

6. Politics and pants

 Prince Philip accompanies the Queen as she meets the then Scottish First Minister Alex Salmond, former First Minister Jack McConnell and then Scottish Tory leader Annabel Goldie

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Prince Philip accompanies the Queen as she meets the then Scottish First Minister Alex Salmond, former First Minister Jack McConnell and then Scottish Tory leader Annabel GoldieCredit: Times Newspapers Ltd

When he met the then Scottish Tory leader Annabel Goldie in 2007 he said: “That’s a nice tie… Do you have any knickers in that material?”

7. Plane sick of it

 The Queen and Prince Philip watching a Concorde fly over Buckingham Palace

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The Queen and Prince Philip watching a Concorde fly over Buckingham PalaceCredit: Getty Images

He said of the Concorde which flew over Buckingham Palace in 2002 before it was decommissioned: “I must be the only person in Britain glad to see the back of that plane.”

8. The Queen of tolerance

 The Queen and Prince Philip marking their diamond wedding anniversary in 2007

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The Queen and Prince Philip marking their diamond wedding anniversary in 2007Credit: Getty Images

The Queen and Prince Philip have been married for 70 years. When speaking of the topic of marriage in 1997 the Duke of Edinburgh said: “You can take it from me the Queen has the quality of tolerance in abundance.”

9. Tender times

 The first colour photograph of Princess Anne in 1951, in the arms of her mother the Queen with Prince Philip and a young Prince Charles

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The first colour photograph of Princess Anne in 1951, in the arms of her mother the Queen with Prince Philip and a young Prince CharlesCredit: Getty Images

He is well known for making gaffes but Prince Philip has also often been pictured sharing tender moments with his family. Here he gazes at his young daughter, Princess Anne, as the Queen holds her in 1951.

10. Not snap happy

 Prince Philip poses at the RAF Club to commemorate the 75th Anniversary of the Battle of Britain

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Prince Philip poses at the RAF Club to commemorate the 75th Anniversary of the Battle of BritainCredit: Getty Images

He lost his patience when an official photograph was being taken in 2015 at the RAF Club, and was said to exclaim: “Just take the f****** picture.”

11. Schoolboy error

 The Duke of Edinburgh pictured about to shake hands with Essex schoolboy George Barlow

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The Duke of Edinburgh pictured about to shake hands with Essex schoolboy George BarlowCredit: News Group Newspapers Ltd

To schoolboy George Barlow in 2003, who had written a letter to the Queen, Prince Philip reportedly said: “Ah, you’re the one who wrote the letter. So you can write then. Ha, ha!”

12. Career tips

 The Duke pictured here with Andrew Adams at Salford University's summer school in 2001

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The Duke pictured here with Andrew Adams at Salford University’s summer school in 2001Credit: Manchester Evening News

He told a 13-year-old boy, Andrew Adams “you’re too fat to be an astronaut” on a school visit in 2001.

13. Dressed to impress

 Prince Philip was accompanying the Queen on a Diamond Jubilee Tour to Bromley in 2012 when he met Hannah Jackson, in red

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Prince Philip was accompanying the Queen on a Diamond Jubilee Tour to Bromley in 2012 when he met Hannah Jackson, in redCredit: CASCADE NEWS

The Duke of Edinburgh met with a 25-year-old council worker, Hannah Jackson, in 2012 in Bromley, in Kent. She was wearing a dress with a zip running the length of its front and he said to her: “I would get arrested if I unzipped that dress.”

14. Birthday celebrations

 Prince Philip pictured here on the eve of his 90th birthday in 2011 to take the salute of the Household Division Beating Retreat in London

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Prince Philip pictured here on the eve of his 90th birthday in 2011 to take the salute of the Household Division Beating Retreat in LondonCredit: Reuters

When Prince Philip turned 90 in 2011 he jovially remarked that “bits are beginning to drop off”. 15. The secret of school

 Malala Yousafzai laughs as she meets Prince Philip and he shakes her father's hand in 2013

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Malala Yousafzai laughs as she meets Prince Philip and he shakes her father’s hand in 2013Credit: Getty Images

He met with Malala Yousafzai in 2013, who survived an assassination attempt by the Taliban after campaigning for the right of girls to go to school without fear. She giggled as he remarked: “[Children] go to school because their parents don’t want them in the house.”

16. Risky remark

 The Queen and Prince Phillip the Duke of Edinburgh on the Great Wall of China during a royal visit in October 1986

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The Queen and Prince Phillip the Duke of Edinburgh on the Great Wall of China during a royal visit in October 1986Credit: Getty Images

One of his more famous gaffes was when Prince Philip told British students in China during the 1986 state visit: “If you stay here much longer, you’ll all be slitty-eyed.”

17. Proud dad

 Princess Anne and Prince Philip at her wedding to Lieutenant Mark Philips at Westminster Abbey in 1973

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Princess Anne and Prince Philip at her wedding to Lieutenant Mark Philips at Westminster Abbey in 1973Credit: Alpha Press

The Duke of Edinburgh walks arm-in-arm with his daughter, Princess Anne, down the aisle of Westminster Abbey in 1973 on her wedding day.

Prince Philip’s life in pictures – from racing around on mini-motorbike to proudly wearing Royal Marine uniform

PHILIP’S ROYAL GAFFES

The Duke of Edinburgh’s Royal engagements have often been marked with legendary gaffes – here’s some of the unpictured ones.

“British women can’t cook” (in Britain in 1966).

“What do you gargle with, pebbles?” (speaking to singer Tom Jones after the 1969 Royal Variety Performance).

“I declare this thing open, whatever it is.” (on a visit to Canada in 1969).

“It looks like a tart’s bedroom.” (on seeing plans for the Duke and Duchess of York’s house at Sunninghill Park in 1988)

“Yak, yak, yak; come on get a move on.” (shouted from the deck of Britannia in Belize in 1994 to the Queen who was chatting to her hosts on the quayside).

“How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to get them through the test?” (to a driving instructor in Oban, Scotland, during a 1995 walkabout).

“Bloody silly fool!” (in 1997, referring to a Cambridge University car park attendant who did not recognise him).

“It looks as if it was put in by an Indian.” (pointing at an old-fashioned fusebox in a factory near Edinburgh in 1999).

“Deaf? If you are near there, no wonder you are deaf.” (to young deaf people in Cardiff, in 1999, referring to a school’s steel band).

“You are a woman, aren’t you?”(In Kenya, in 1984, after accepting a small gift from a local woman).

“Oh no, I might catch some ghastly disease.” (in Australia, in 1992, when asked to stroke a Koala bear).

“You can’t have been here that long – you haven’t got a pot belly.” (to a Briton in Budapest, Hungary, in 1993).

“Aren’t most of you descended from pirates?” (to a wealthy islander in the Cayman Islands in 1994).

“You managed not to get eaten, then?” (suggesting to a student in 1998 who had been trekking in Papua New Guinea that tribes there were still cannibals).

“I wish he’d turn the microphone off.” (muttered at the Royal Variety Performance as he watched Sir Elton John perform, 2001).

“You look like a suicide bomber.” (to a young female officer wearing a bullet-proof vest on Stornoway, Isle of Lewis, in 2002).

“Well, you didn’t design your beard too well, did you?” (to designer Stephen Judge about his tiny goatee beard in July 2009).

“There’s a lot of your family in tonight.” (after looking at the name badge of businessman Atul Patel at a Palace reception for British Indians in October 2009).

“How many people have you knocked over this morning on that thing?” (meeting disabled David Miller who drives a mobility scooter at the Valentine Mansion in Redbridge in March 2012)

“Most stripping is done by hand.” (to 83-year-old Mars factory worker Audrey Cook when discussing how she used to strip or cut Mars Bars by hand in April 2013)

“You look starved.” (to a pensioner on a visit to the Charterhouse almshouse for elderly men – February 2017)

“Are you asking me if the Queen is going to die?” (on being questioned on when the Prince of Wales would succeed to the throne)

“I hope he breaks his bloody neck.” (when a photographer covering a royal visit to India fell out of a tree)

“When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.” (on marriage).

“It’s a pleasant change to be in a country that isn’t ruled by its people.” (to Alfredo Stroessner, the Paraguayan dictator).

“Where did you get that hat?” (supposedly to Queen at her Coronation).


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